even the best fall down sometimes
HOW TO FLIRT IN A MUSEUM: Introduce yourself and then say ‘I would shake your hand but that signs says not to touch the masterpieces.’
is ellen even hosting or is she just hanging out with famous people
So i have this giant pencil right
I think we all know where this is going.
the amount of people saying that they were expecting me to shove it up my ass is alarming
If there is that one person in your life that is always there for you no matter how you treat them, and listens when no one else does, and just cares and comforts you even in your darkest moments, do not EVER let them go. Ever.
tripped and fell in my heelys jesus take the wheelys
What if your giving a bj in the shower and he just starts shampooing and conditioning your hair
kidzbop is gonna be like “my anaconda don’t want none unless u like fun, hun!!”
"oh my gosh. look at her heart!"
maybe Jesus was gay the whole time and was actually saying “ah, men”
STOP I SHOULD NOT BE LAUGHING
I don’t want sex, I want the things that lead up to it. The slow kissing then the passionate kissing, then the pulling closer, the neck kisses, the grabbing, biting, heavy breathing, grinding, the pauses while you catch your breath, feeling each other. Oh my.